The Wrong Knickers

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Even though I LOVE Christmas, it's not a very productive time for me. Santa pisses all over my routine and my brain only functions around chocolate, tinsel and alcohol with bubbles. But now it's all over, I can finally get back into my growing pile of books. I feared that all the alcohol may have caused me to forget how to read, but I'm fine and the first one I must tell you about is The Wrong Knickers by Bryony Gordon.




First of all, ITS FANTASTIC! I would recommend this to all my single friends, all my not so single friends and even my mum. It's refreshing to read something so honest because I feel everyone is beginning to loose hope. We're getting so used to seeing the worlds most perfect relationships and Made In Chelsea's champagne popping, lavish love lives that we assume this is how it is - WRONG. Bryony says it how it is and she will make you laugh the whole way.  


Like all good books of course it has a lovely ending but a real one with all the shit that actually happens in life in between. So I take my Christmas hat off to Bryony. 

So I am telling you to put it on your list because it's well worth a read. It will be all you've been waiting for since Bridget Jones, just a little bit naughtier and better.

Although I will warn you, you may not be able to butter your toast in the same way ever again. For some, there is more to this dairy delight than just buttering up your carbs.

Yeah I'd be intrigued too, go do it! (The book, not the butter..)


Xxx

Foodie Heaven

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After my third visit, I thought it was time to put into writing the wonders of Cardiff street food. 

I go through food phases, sausage is my current obesession and the depot has plenty of it ( you can take this whatever way you like..) ANYWAY, a couple of the girls had been raving about this place and I had seen countless pictures of dirty hot dogs on twitter - The first and only question: Where do I sign up?

I was told to follow the beards down Dumballs road, which led me to food heaven in the coolest place on earth. I've managed to try a forkful of most of the stalls, but these were my absolute favourites:



Haute Dog - I have tried all 3 flavours and every mouthful has been followed by a muffled "AAAAH MAAA GAAAHD!" they are SO good and proved that popping candy on a sausage is a genius idea. 


Meat and Greek - Since returning from Santorini in summer, halloumi, tzatziki and houmous have become a staple part of my diet. Unfortunately this does not make my dream of becoming a Greek goddess easy, but once you've tried their souvlaki, being that content, with houmous all over your face is a much better feeling. 


Doughboys - Pizza is not usually a favourite of mine, but I had heard such good things about these ones...I took one of these home and walked through town on match day holding it close to my chest, incase someone stole it and broke my heart. It tasted amazing cold,  so I imagine a warm gooey one is even better. 

Jols food co - I will say one thing - Philadelphia cheese steak sandwich. This was the contender that stole the show for me. I would never usually go for something like this, but my boyfriend left me alone with it to go to the bar... It was seriously the best thing I have ever tasted. Ignore the fact that it smells like a foot ( the Stilton) because nothing else will matter, except for you and that juicy steak sandwich. It was a special moment.
(Apologies for the terrible quality picture, my mouth was watering and trying to arrange the table would have been too much.)

For the sweet tooth, there is the creme brulee bar and Mr Churro - both just as delicious and the perfect fork to stick in once your done. 

I am going to be SO sad to see all these amazing food traders go their separate ways, but I have loved every minute and every single calorie. 

Please Come back soon!!!!

xxx

LONDON

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This weekend the foodie in me died and went to carb heaven. There is something about the sweet smell of London food joints, that makes it very easy to leave the city 2 stone heavier. 

The bustle of Oxford street can work up a hefty appetite, which is the perfect excuse for me. Bacon seemed to be the theme of the weekend, which I was more than happy to oblige with.


Besides how can you possibly do anything without a bacon sandwich and tea? 

These were some of my favourite things:




Some may say the burger hype is getting too much, this is perfectly understandable, but really have you tried Byron? I am totally getting the hype and they do courgette fries, that's enough to make me do a little dance.



Breakfast of kings (and queens) 



COFFEE BREAK. We went for a chocolate layer cake, it's sugar in its best form and the mini cupcakes are enough to make any woman get over excited.








See those giant baubles, that's me today. Round and extremely excited for Christmas. 

London you're so naughty, but I still love you dearly. 

xxx

I Love Christmas

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I am one of those annoying humans, who gets excited about Christmas in September. The sight of a Christmas tree or red cup sends me into festive over drive.

These are some of my favourite things:

Feeling like Rowan Atkinson in  Love Actually  when wrapping presents - This is my time to shine.


Chirades!!..unless you get Free Willy, then that's just awkward.

Looking into the ends of all the Christmas crackers and making sure the best one is by your plate.

Getting to wear a crown at the dinner table.



The Ultimate cheat day - 24 hours where you can eat anything and everything, because calories don't count.

When every girl thinks they can sing like Mariah, because suddenly at Christmas you can.

Getting to eat chocolate before breakfast everyday. Hello advent, I like you.

Sugar filled Christmas coffee cups - I am so guilty of loving the festive flavours.



 When its perfectly normal to hang a big sock on your door, that is filled with satsumas and an eyebrow pencil on Christmas morning.

Christmas shopping - The best competitive sport around.

How girls will happily sit on the knee of a fat, old, bearded man; If this was a Saturday night, this would not be ok, but because its Christmas, WHY NOT?!

Patiently waiting for the pyjama fairy to come with the goods on Christmas eve.

Drinking and eating non stop for 3 days straight.

Regretting drinking and eating for 3 days straight when your jeans no longer fit.

The only time of the year where a 6 foot tree is welcomed indoors.

The mad rush of Christmas morning, where you are guaranteed to see Noddy Holder on the TV at least once when opening your presents.

Turkey sandwiches, turkey dinner, turkey curry, turkey soup - No wonder we only have this bird once a year.

So I must get my elasticated jeans at the ready and prepare for some over eating, under sleeping and many renditions of the entire Michael Buble Christmas album.

Now where are the mince pies? 

xxx



Party Perfect with McArthurGlen

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This party season I made it my mission to buy my whole outfit in one day (usually impossible for the most indecisive person you will meet..) but the thought of going into town amongst buggies and men selling bird whistles, was not something I had in mind. So give me a cosy outlet tucked away from the city center, with Kurt Geiger and a Cadburys shop and I'm there.



I hadn't been to McArthurGlen for years and all I remembered was the play pen "Yeah mum you go ahead, I'll hang out here in the wood chips with my ice cream" So I was intrigued  to make another visit, but this time not to the play pen..

As dress shopping is serious business, we made sure we had full bellies and were all stretched and ready for an intense shopping workout - Those sequin dresses weigh a ton..

Anyway, I made a beeline for Ted Baker, I had my eye on a seriously pink, furry number. With handfuls of goodies to try, I whittled it down to a black or red dress, and of course I went for black, it is standard wardrobe attire for me, except Ted baker fits like no other and will now be my staple LBD, which every girl needs in her life. 

Then it was my favorite bit - Accessories. Like a magpie for pink, I spotted this gorgeous furry clutch and couldn't part with it, so it was a done deal. Sealed firmly once I saw the French bull dog lining on the inside. 






With my Ted Baker bag swinging on my arm and a smile like a cheshire cat, we headed straight to Kurt Geiger to treat our feet to some much needed sparkle. My boots were off as soon as we got through the door and my eye was caught by these beauty's!





Cinderella definitely wasn't wearing Kurt, because there is no way anybody could leave one of these behind. 
It was shoe love.


So that was me, I managed to get my entire Christmas outfit in one stress-free day and didn't cry once. 



Dress shopping usually takes me hours/days/weeks...but this was very easy and we wondered around for hours, hopping from one shop to the next. I spotted some must have items for work which I will definitely be going back for! (The Calvin Klein store also does clothes now which are amazing!!)



Have you ever seen anyone so excited by a metallic pair of trousers?

So all in all a VERY successful day of shopping, that has me counting down the days until the festive celebrations start.


Now pass me the mini mince pies and prosecco, these shoes aren't going to dance by themselves.

xxx

Christmas List

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Dear Santa or my boyfriend,

First of all, I can explain about all those times I didn't do the dishes, truth is, it chips your nail polish something awful, BUT I did start recycling. (one bag)

Anyway, I thought I would give you a picture copy of my list as I imagine everyone else just wrote theirs out.

They don't have to be these exact items, it's just a few ideas, as I am sure you don't want to see this face again on Christmas morning..



Don't make me wave my hairbrush at you Santa.

Just a heads up, my favourite colours are BLACK (of course) white, pink and gold - Even better when they are altogether, I  also like polkadots and stripes, and if you're going to get me any chocolate, I prefer dark.




























Happy Shopping S Dawg!


I will most likely see you before Christmas as I have heard you're in a grotto somewhere in Cardiff? 

Anyway, take care and don't go too hard on the cardio before your big night.

 I will make sure Jan puts the fire out early to avoid you burning your trousers.

Lots of Christmas love

Jade

xxx


P.s You don't have to eat the mince pie that I leave for you, it wont be Marks and Sparks finest, so I would probably leave it if I were you.


20 Things That Have Changed Since Leaving Uni

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Mondays are so much worse.



Now as a twenty something, my bag on a night out no longer consists of a little bottle of cheap vodka, a sharpie and £5.

Going out mid week? Sorry, you mean have a hangover on a week day? I don't think so.



A diet that consists of cereal and vodka is no longer acceptable.


Waking up like this on a Sunday morning, with toasted pitta in my bed, a stamp on my hand/face and looking for water is now quite rare.

Never wanting to touch an alcopop, strawpedo or any bright green juice of any kind ever again. (Unless it is a kale smoothie, then I am all about that.)

No more free money. 



Inhaling a bag of skittles at 3am to get you through that deadline. Nowadays at 3am, I have been asleep for 6 hours, not one skittle in sight.


Buying something new every time I went out. Now I have to justify a pair of socks.

Cost per wear is applied to anything and everything I now purchase. 5p bag..go on then I can definitely reuse that one as a rain hat.

Mid afternoon naps are sadly a thing of the past 



Cooking. Who'd have thought that I could rustle up something better than a bowl of cereal in the kitchen?


A month off for Christmas is something we can now only dream of.



Not feeling the need to hide the toilet roll when people come around. Only for people who live here, soz.


Bottles of £2.99 wine for pre drinks with a straw. Never Again.



Being able to put your food ANYWHERE in the fridge, not just the one, tiny, squished shelf that is allocated to you and your spinach.


Waking up and getting ready in the morning is not as easy as it used to be.

Running out of bread. In desperate times, one of the many cupboards before, would have contained someone's bread. Now when it's gone, ITS GONE. You can search all the cupboards but you won't find any.


Experimenting with all the different shampoos in the shower, now it's just the one that you buy. How boring.

Carnage (Or Cornage in Cornwall) and always managing to wake up with a permanent marker dick on your face that won't come off for days. Who is the infamous dick drawer? 


What wonderful years of cereal, whiskers and hangovers, but now give me a cup of tea and some fluffy socks any day.

xxx

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